Well it has officially been a month since my surgery. Wow, that was a lot more than I thought. My last surgery was painful emotionally. I had lost my breasts, I had cancer and I still had radiation to get through. This surgery was painful physically. My right side reconstruction wasn't that bad. I probably could have been back to work in a few days. Now, my left side reconstruction was awful. The difference is that my left side needed a lat. flap. They took my muscle from my back and transferred it to reconstruct my breast with a small implant. My back was in a lot of pain. I still can't pick up much from the ground or sleep very long on that side. I can get through this. I have to keep telling myself that.
I am also dealing with fatigue. I am tired a lot. Tired at work, tired at home. It has to do with the surgery, recovering still from chemo and radiation. My white count still isn't back up to normal. I found that surprising. Cancer is the pits. Now I have started worrying about every little pain. Is my cancer back? Could this be something that I should see the doctor about? It is so frustrating. The part I hate is that I know that this is my life from now on. My cancer could grow back. I keep telling myself to heal but sometimes God has another plan for us and I have to just do my part. I have started exercising again and I am trying to eat better. For now, that is all I can do.
My Support System
I have the best time with these guys
Friday, April 26, 2013
Monday, March 25, 2013
Sugery Tomorrow
Yikes! Surgery is tomorrow. I am nervous/scared/excited all at once. I don't know what I'm getting into, I hate the pain and I also just want it to be over! I thought it would be interesting to explain what I am doing....
Reconstruction information
Also, here is a YouTube video...
I will report about it soon.........
Reconstruction information
I will report about it soon.........
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Easter...Smeaster
I am feeling like I don't like this time of year. I like the religious part and all but I have had enough! Let me explain. 2011...I had Houston 3 days prior. I wasn't really able to do much with the kids with a brand new baby. 2012....I had my port place on the Friday before and I was sick. I was having chemo on the Tuesday after. I wasn't really able to have fun with the kids. 2013.....I am having major surgery on the 26th and Easter is the 31st. Again, I will not be able to enjoy this holiday with the kids. I really wish that I was having a baby, at least that was a joyous event. I guess I should just be rejoicing that I am alive! Yes, I am happy about that but "Can someone else out there have a turn?"
Happy Easter everyone!
Happy Easter everyone!
Friday, March 15, 2013
My Year Long Adventure
So, it has ALMOST be one full year since my diagnosis and my week next week is SOOOO busy so I decided to post this a tad bit early. I made a slide show to document this journey. It is not one that I would wish on anyone but it is also one that I would never take back. I have met so many kind, good people along this path. I have learned to love life and to love people. Some of the fun things that I got to do this year: Wicked in Las Vegas, teaching the 7th graders about Cancer, Lee Denim Day at school, Park City retreat, Seattle conference, Jazz game with Todd, Relay for Life, Save a Sister, SUU gymnastics meet, Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and all the birthdays in between. I have enjoyed having more time on this Earth. My prayer is for even more. Some of the not so happy times: Chemo, radiation, blood draws, shots, losing my hair, surgeries, pain, throwing up, losing my eyelashes, and not being able to hold my baby at times. Those are the worst.
If you are close to me, you are probably in here. It is only because I wanted to honor those around me as well. Thank you for all you've done. Click the link below-----
This is You Tube
This is Keynote
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Birthday
My birthday is coming and let's face it, it's been a pretty horrible year. My 34th year will forever be remembered as the worst year of my life (so far). I am excited to turn 35 because it will turn the page on this never ending saga. I have been asked what I wanted and I have a few wishes:
1. No more poison being dripped into my chest.
2. No more knives cutting away my body.
3. No more scarves, hats or soft cloths for my head (hair growth is fabulous).
4. No more nightmares about cancer growing back....I will really have to work on this.
5. I would really like to limit the amount of people who see my breasts, yes they are still mine and I still have some amount of dignity.
6. I would like to take away the pity in people eyes when they see me. I am still alive and I don't
need people to see me as a cancer patient.
7. I would like to take away my fear, fear that I will never see another birthday, another Christmas, children's graduations and all of the fun events in their lives.
8. I would love to take away my scars, the physical and the emotional ones.
9. I would like to forgive myself and God. It wasn't my fault this happened and it wasn't God's.
It happened and now I need to move forward.
Okay I had my pity party and now I can move on. There is more to cancer than the medical treatment. We have to talk about it and then we can move on.
1. No more poison being dripped into my chest.
2. No more knives cutting away my body.
3. No more scarves, hats or soft cloths for my head (hair growth is fabulous).
4. No more nightmares about cancer growing back....I will really have to work on this.
5. I would really like to limit the amount of people who see my breasts, yes they are still mine and I still have some amount of dignity.
6. I would like to take away the pity in people eyes when they see me. I am still alive and I don't
need people to see me as a cancer patient.
7. I would like to take away my fear, fear that I will never see another birthday, another Christmas, children's graduations and all of the fun events in their lives.
8. I would love to take away my scars, the physical and the emotional ones.
9. I would like to forgive myself and God. It wasn't my fault this happened and it wasn't God's.
It happened and now I need to move forward.
Okay I had my pity party and now I can move on. There is more to cancer than the medical treatment. We have to talk about it and then we can move on.
Conference Fun
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| Space Needle |
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| Kim, my sister from Tennessee |
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| View from the Space Needle |
| My sisters from Virginia, I will forever be grateful for their friendship |
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| Pike's Fish Market, what a fun place |
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| This picture is mostly for the awesome guy behind me. |
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| Gum wall, yuck! |
| Jazz Game, it was a long week |
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| Second row seats |
| Loving the cheesy background |
| Everyone who went to C4YW |
Saturday, February 16, 2013
C4YW
My next adventure is attending the C4YW conference in Seattle, WA. I leave on Thursday Feb 21. I am traveling all by myself. This is a giant leap for me. I will meet up with two of my friends from my Park City experience. It is going to be so much fun. I get to learn all about things that affect women my age going through breast cancer. I also get to spend more time with my friends from Park City. They will be traveling from Tennessee and Missouri. I was able to receive a travel grant that will help pay for my flight, hotel and the registration fee is waived. I feel very BLESSED! I will report on my adventures.
Life has been so so busy since Christmas. I went back to school and I am doing an internship with my principal. I want to finish my endorsement so that I can work in administration some day! This next week I will be helping with the Multicultural Night at school. What a busy week. My trip will complete it and give me a little rest.
Here is a little information about C4YW:
Thirteen years ago, in collaboration with the Breast Health Institute, Living Beyond Breast Cancer (LBBC)
held the first Annual Conference for Young Women Affected by Breast Cancer. The conference was
created in response to a survey LBBC conducted of women under the age of 45 who had been
diagnosed with breast cancer. Survey data indicated these women wanted a day-long educational
program targeted to address their needs while providing a forum to network with others who shared
similar situations. The conference drew 300 women from 17 states and consisted of a morning plenary
session and six afternoon workshops. The following year, LBBC partnered with Young Survival Coalition
(YSC), who played an important role in building attendance by inviting its members to the conference.
Today this one-of-a-kind event, renamed C4YW in 2010, is the only conference dedicated exclusively to
the unique needs of young women affected by breast cancer, as well as the needs of their families,
friends, supporters and caregivers. C4YW addresses the fact that when a young woman is diagnosed
with breast cancer, she often feels isolated and alone. Her psychosocial and medical issues are
fundamentally different than those of older, post-menopausal women, as is the impact of her diagnosis.
C4YW acknowledges these issues by delivering educational sessions that provide attendees relevant
information in easy-to-understand language.
LBBC and YSC work closely with the world’s most respected health professionals to ensure C4YW
content reflects the most current interests of women diagnosed with all stages of breast cancer.
Information is always conveyed compassionately and intelligently during three days of plenary sessions
and specialized workshops. In addition, sessions for caregivers, partners, families and friends are also
featured.
C4YW 2013 takes place Friday, February 22 – Sunday, February 24, 2013 at the Hyatt Regency Bellevue
on Seattle’s East Side - with an anticipated attendance of almost 1,000 participants from across the
country and around the world. More than 75 exhibitors, many that specialize in services specifically for
the breast cancer community, will also be on-site to provide participants with access to additional
resources, information and products.
For the past seven years, Susan G. Komen for the Cure® has generously supported C4YW, providing
travel grant funding to ensure that women experiencing financial challenges have access to the
conference.Fact Sheet: Young Women and Breast Cancer
The Facts
Despite the prevailing opinions that young women don’t get breast cancer, the reality is that they can
and they do. Here are some important and startling facts about breast cancer in young women:
- In 2008, the American Cancer Society projects 182,460 new cases of breast cancer in females; it
is estimated that 10,000 of these women will be under 40 years of age, and nearly 23,000 will be
under 45 years of age.
1 One in 20 women with breast cancer is under age 40 when diagnosed. One in 8 women
diagnosed with breast cancer is younger than 45 when diagnosed.
2 Breast cancer accounts for 26% of all cancer in females 15-39 years of age and 39% of all
cancer in 35- to 39-year-olds.
3 Young women’s breast cancers are generally more aggressive and result in lower survival rates. Increasingly, evidence suggests that breast cancer before age 40 is biologically different from
the majority of breast cancer that occurs in older women. Women younger than 25 may have a
third type of biologically distinct breast cancer. As the incidence of young women with breast cancer is much lower than in older women, young women are often an underrepresented population in research studies.
The Issues Young women diagnosed with breast cancer face a myriad of issues that may significantly impact their quality and quantity of life. Some of these concerns include:
Body Image: It may be challenging for some women to embrace their new body after breast
cancer-related surgery.
Relationships & Dating: Whether married or single, intimacy issues may arise for women who’ve
been diagnosed with breast cancer.
Fertility: Breast cancer treatment may affect a woman’s future plans to have children.
Financial Challenges: Breast cancer can dramatically impact a woman’s financial stability when
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